The new smoking

While my parents made the proverbial “bacon”, my brother and I fixed ourselves hot dogs and pizza rolls in the microwave, followed up by Little Debbie’s and diet soda to wash it down.  This type of eating, along with the emotional aspects of weight gain/loss and the impact of genetics led to my being overweight at a very early age.  I remember being put on my first diet in the 1st grade.  I have gained and lost 50+ pounds more times in my life than I care to remember.  While I’ve come a long way, these ingrained behaviors along with the emotional roller coaster that gaining and losing weight has taken a toll on my life and quite possibly my health.  I still have not kicked this monkey off my back.  They say obesity is the new smoking; well I proudly quit smoking 8 years ago.  The difference, however, is I never have to smoke again in my life, never have to learn how to ration myself while not over-indulging, eating is a different story. I have to eat to live everyday, but many days what happens is, I live to eat.  I do my best to embrace conscious eating, follow the yogic path and a bit to my credit, I did just have a baby 5 months ago.  However, I’ve been teetering between 85 and 90 pounds over my goal weight for the past 5 months.  No weight loss since 2 weeks post-natal.  Yes, I should give myself time; yes, I should be patient, but I do not feel comfortable in this body and I desperately want to get back to my goal weight, which is 90 pounds lighter.  It’s about more than just looking in the mirror.  I want to walk up and down the stairs without being winded, I want to be able to fit through the tunnel in the kids play land, in the event my son gets stuck, scared and needs me.  I want my butt to comfortably fit in a chair without squishing and squeezing into it. I don’t want to see people eyeing me up and down when I tell them I’m a yoga teacher with this look on their face like, “you’ve got to be kidding me right?”. 
I hope as this column progresses, people can relate to my story and as I make my way through this life long journey, I may inspire, comfort, support and offer encouragement to others. 

May you be happy, may you be healthy, may you know peace.

Jai Bhagwan!
Julie